Math, Grace, and the Promised Land

I love math. 1+2=3... Simple...pretictable...able to create. Everything within me desires Jesus. I want to know Him so intimately. I want to know His very heart beat. I want to be with Him where He is. Jesus is not a math problem. The Lord showed me tonight how I have strayed from His grace (again!) into my own system of calculating and striving. "Okay....if it can just look like this...okay, I think if I can have this much time, with this much fasting, and this much Word....there He'll be." Wow...that's really how I've lived.

He reminded me of His love for me. He reminded me that His ways are higher than my ways and He's giving me room to grow. Even Jesus, when He was on the earth, had to LEARN obedience. The Word says that He grew in wisdom and stature. He's giving me room to grow and learn. I don't want to live as a fearful slave but as His Bride in whom He delights. I want to be led by the Spirit...but not in a fearful walking on egg shells kind of way...but the way of holiness, joy, and peace. Teach me, Jesus.

The Lord is faithful. He's giving me what I could have never earned or calculated for.

Look Jacob a verse for us. He's set everything before us :)
"Look, the Lord your God has set the land before you; go up and possess it, as the Lord God of your fathers has spoken to you; do not fear or be discouraged" (Deut 1:21).